Blogworthy

Recently I haven't really seen or done anything that seems blogworthy, but today I read something that certainly is. I've been reading Anne Coulter's Godless and came upon a story that is nothing short of incredible. (Chapter 2, page 59)

Apparently, a rape suspect (and later murderer) abducted a Christian by the name of Ashley Smith. At some point during her abduction, she began reading The Purpose Driven Life to him. At one point, he asked her to repeat a paragraph and she did; then she started reading to him from the New Testament.

After hearing this, he surrendered the next morning a changed man, ready to do pennance for his crimes. Simply amazing.

Today's workout:

Back Squat, 5-5-5-5-5

135, 185, 195, 205, 1 rep of 215 and 4 of 205 (thought my spine was going to pop out!)

Rest

Three rounds for time:
Sprint (or jog, by the end!!) 800m
50 back raises (did them on the ground due to lack of equipment)
50 situps (no assistance)

It was great...Funny thing is, I had to force myself to eat after this. I'm usually starving! But eat I did, an entire package of vegetarian protein chili.

I've got lots of friends, or friends of friends, in mission fields and doing great things for the Lord. I feel jealous and a little bit depressed. It's hard to accept where I'm at right now, especially thinking about cross-training and what I'd do if it was denied. I don't know why it would be denied, but you never know...I thoroughly hate what I have to do now and I hate the effects it has on my personality and life with Christ. I also hate the separation from friends, one friend in particular. Grrrr. Hate. It's what's for dinner. Sheesh.

I feel depressed. It feels like there is a hole inside me that nothing can fill.

Last Sunday I dreamed that I was in a church community, the likes of which I haven't really experienced for maybe two years or so. After waking up, I realized the apartement was empty except for me. It felt empty in more ways than one.

I realized that I'd had the same dream and same experience the Sunday before last, too. This time the depression has not let go. I don't know where to go with it. Ugh.

You'll never guess what happened inside my truck yesterday!

I went to Starbucks to study on my American History homework. When I came back out, I realized that a can of fix-a-flat had exploded inside my truck! Now I get low-level chemical burns every time I drive because the stuff is all over my steering wheel. Not to mention the fumes are toxic. Fun!! The weird thing is that it happened at night, several hours after the sun went down. I could see it happening during a hot afternoon, but at night? Weird.
I found out that whatever company the military trusts with my personal information had a stupid employee that compromised millions of people's info. Now they are sending out "Protect your identity" emails. It's not a laughing matter for sure; but come on, what am I going to do about it? "WHOOPWHOOPWHOOP INITIATE ID ALERT PROCEDURES IMMEDIATELY!!!" That just about exhausts my options.

Ewwww!!!

You'll never guess what happened inside my truck yesterday!

I went to Starbucks to study on my American History homework. When I came back out, I realized that a can of fix-a-flat had exploded inside my truck! Now I get low-level chemical burns every time I drive because the stuff is all over my steering wheel. Not to mention the fumes are toxic. Fun!! The weird thing is that it happened at night, several hours after the sun went down. I could see it happening during a hot afternoon, but at night? Weird.
I found out that whatever company the military trusts with my personal information had a stupid employee that compromised millions of people's info. Now they are sending out "Protect your identity" emails. It's not a laughing matter for sure; but come on, what am I going to do about it? "WHOOPWHOOPWHOOP INITIATE ID ALERT PROCEDURES IMMEDIATELY!!!" That just about exhausts my options.

Haha...Some updates....

First, for all the folks in the Gulf area: Crossfit Gulf Coast

Yesterday's Crossfit Demo on base went pretty well! We did the following workout:

All exercises for time, no breaks between, one circuit each:
45lb thrusters
1 pood KB swings
bear crawl
long jumps
box jumps
scullies
back raises

Most people seemed to like it. :)

Next on the agenda: If you've ever worried about aliens or rogue government agents (or maybe non rogue agents) attempting to control your mind, well, I have some good news! You need to construct an Aluminum Tin Foil Deflector Beanie. They're obviously reliable...it's on the internet, so it HAS to be true.

Fourth, don't know if it's an "I told you so," or what. A while back I posted a link to a site that said the new scramjet engine (cruises at supersonic speeds) would be used for things like, oh, delivering organs to recipients and other humanitarian crap. Here's a link to the on of the real reasons the scramjet was developed. I will admit it's a scary thing to know that kind of firepower is out there, but that fear goes both ways. Would bin Crapface have done what he did had he known that a missile could come out of nowhere while he was watching the news reports? For him, yeah probably...But I'm sure there are others who would think twice about it. I sure would.

Finally, why the WMD finds in Iraq were kept secret. I thought this would be informative, so there it is.

Well, I'm out. Gotta go study some American History, I've got a paper due tomorrow that I haven't even started!! Argue!! Hard work pays of later, but laziness pays off now. :)

Tomorrow

Yikes!

Tomorrow is the second ever unofficial Crossfit Demo for the PTL course. This time we'll be inside (vs. 90 degrees and 1000% humidity!). I haven't quite decided what to do yet. There will be appx 15 people per group, so equipment will be hard to come by...there aren't even enough places to do pullups for that many people. (Even though I've used each basketball goal as a pullup bar for four people at once, I don't think that would go well for an official function...something about safety....)

I've been thinking about getting an AR-15. To bad the hippie commies will probably have them outlawed before I'm able to actually afford one. If you have any experience with these (rifles), please give me a head's up.

Anyway, gotta go find a good workout. Cya!

PAST #1

Well, today was an eventful day...I completed PAST #1.

Pushups: 76 (42 required)
Situps: 65 (53 required)
Two-Miler: 15:07 (15:54 required)
Pullups: 14 (non-weighted)

I'd be happier with a shorter run time, but am thankful that I've received the grace to do this much. Back in Feb/Apr my knees hurt so bad I could hardly run a mile. Well, this portion is done, now I just have to deal with all the desk monkeys to get the paperwork in...Adios.

Danny

Goodbyes

Sheesh, I hate goodbyes. I just departed a friend's house, an O who is trading the striped dome for an M4 and a radio. Cool thing is, if becoming a TACP really is what God wants, then there's a slight, very slight, chance that I may be working for him within the next couple of years. At least I got to salute him one last time. Who knows? Stranger things have happened, like seeing Knight Rider LED's on a Firebird earlier in the evening.

Grrrr....

I am NOT happy this morning.
On the way to church, I saw a guy stranded on the road, so I decided to turn around and go help him. By the time I got there, someone else had stopped. Since I was going to be late for the early service, I decided to stay at Starbucks until it was time for Sunday school and the late service.
So I got to Starbucks and logged onto the net to find out when Sunday School started. Well, my browser wouldn't load any websites. I thought, no big deal, I'll get my PDA out and check it that way while I restart the computer.
I forgot that Tmobile has a five minute wait period from the time they lose your connection to the time they log you off. I tried to log in to the net from my PDA, but of course it didn't work because I was already logged in.
So I restarted the computer, and as you can tell, it is now mysteriously working again. At least that's going right. I decided to listen to some tunes and read the Scripture from the daily reading plan (which is loaded onto my PDA). Of course, as soon as I started to do that the friggin PDA turned off!!! I have no idea why, either...the battery is low but is being charged, so that's not an issue (or at least hasn't been in the past).
Now there's this friggin FLY that's POKING me in the head every couple of seconds. I'M SO TICKED!!!!

Lazy bones

I've been lazy in posting to the blog the past couple of weeks. That workout bonanza whooped me good, for sure.

Yesterday:
Underwaters X 5 (four at beginning one at end)
8 half lengths kick training(if there and back is a length, otherwise 16)
4 half lengths stroke training (almost got it down! Finally!)
Then:
5.19ish miles, 53 mins...not happy about the time, but factor in a 20 knot wind, 90+ degrees and the swim, it's not too bad.
Then:
Deadlift started at 135, ended at 265, seven reps as per the WOD.

Ridiculous article!

It's official...Men's Health is now dumb. I used to peruse the files there occasionally just because it forces me to re-evaluate where I'm at and what my motivations are. (Am I being lazy? Am I overdoing it? Am I working out for selfish reasons or to be a good steward of my body?) Seeing hairless meteros with washboard six-packs along with the implication that I'm not as valuable a human being as they are tends to give me a gut check. It's just pride, pure and simple. But now I have ammunition, and they gave it to me. :)

Mind over Muscle...Title of article. This is silly. Unless you or someone you know is going to die or receive serious injury, you don't need to push it this far. Actually, most people won't be able to, anyway. Me doing Fight Gone Bad because it's fun and challenging is drastically different than me doing FGB because someone threatens my friend's life if I don't perform to a certain standard. I know what the author is getting at, but please...That's only going to create a "Do it till you drop" mentality, which is not healthy. The body needs rest and easy days! You could argue that Crossfit creates this mentality, too, but Crossfit's safety record speaks for itself. Not to mention the scalability of the Crossfit workouts...Anyone of any fitness level can do it. I'm about to digress so I'll continue with the article.

Run Another Mile subtitle...
The info on glycogen is totally and completely WRONG. Scientifically speaking, the body stops using glycogen just glycogen after a few minutes (depends on the person) of continuous activity. The reason it does this is because your brain runs off glycogen, and if you run out, you die.

What REALLY happens (lots of parentheses here, sorry):
Adenosine Triphosphate (ATP) is the actual source of energy for your body, all energy pathways are dedicated to producing it. The body uses Phosphate Creatine (PC) to create ATP once the stores are depleted in your muscle cells (1-4 seconds). Once the ATP stores are exhausted, you switch to ATP+PC (4-20 seconds), and then to ATP+PC+Muscle Glycogen for about 20-45 seconds. After this, you switch to primarily glycogen for 45-120 seconds. After this, you switch to Muscle Glycogen+Lactic Acid for appx 120-240 seconds. (Speaking of lactic acid, it's hard to not go into a monologue about Crossfit, but I'll wait till later for that one. :)) Next is Muscle Glycogen+Fatty Acids, which goes from 240-600 seconds (or longer, since most of us run for longer than 10 minutes....). Going longer requires the complete oxidation of carbs and fat. Don't ask me to say the previous sentence in English, I can't!
So the point I'm getting to is this...yes, we do get tired in part because we run low on glycogen; however, the article is misleading in the fact that they only mention one energy pathway that is not meant to provide a long-term source of fuel for our body. They also don't mention that when you start an activity all the energy pathways become active; time and intensity determine which pathways become dominant. For some reason I can't post a graph to show this, so click here to see it. The free Crossfit Journal also addresses this briefly, and they show a graph as well. They also address it in other journals, but right now I'm to cheap to buy them. :P

Bench Press Your Last Rep subtitle....
Hmmm...Seems kinda strange...Maybe I'm just not understanding what they are saying. Sounds to me like the author says to practice form with an unloaded bar (good idea!) and then change your form with a loaded bar (what?!?!). Why change form after practicing it the right way? I don't get it.

Pedal Faster/Swim Another Lap subtitle....
Again, they aren't giving the complete story. There is research to suggest (which I'm more inclined to believe than disbelieve) that the whole 'lactic acid threshold' is a bunch of poop. There's an "I can't take this anymore" threshold, there's an "I need to stop for safety reasons" threshold, see above where I talked about what really is mind over matter.
Lactic acid is a FUEL source for your body...When you hurt, you hurt because you're breaking down cells. You don't flush it out, you use it to keep going! Just how do they think you 'flush it,' anyway, sweat? Exhalation? Boogers? I don't' know.
The reason interval training works has nothing to do with a 'lactic threshold.' When you specialize in short, intense training, you double the size of mitochondria in your cells. Mitochondria are like reactors...They turn fuel into energy. The bigger they are, the more you can burn, the more lactic acid you can use, the faster you can go or the longer you can maintain high-intensity exercise.

Do That Last Crunch subtitle...
Do you know what crunches are good for? Crunches. Conditioning is great, but it doesn't really help you in real life (other than getting lots of attention from the opposite sex). Want some good ab exercises? I'll take your crunches, and spot you some Janda situps. Take a weight (that you can handle), hold it in front of your chest as you are in the rest position for situps. SLOWLY, squeeze the glutes (placing a basketball or volleyball between your knees works well to practice), raise, and exhale powerfully on the way up. Rest at the top, repeat going down.
I'll take the previous two and spot you some weirdos. (Name came from a friend that called me a weirdo for doing it. :)) Find a back extension machine. Get on it and face forward (opposite of doing back extension). Adjust the height so that your bottom sits slightly on the top when you are on it. In one smooth motion, lean all the way back, return to top, and lean forward and touch your fingers to your toes. Repeat until vomit appears. Well, maybe not that many times, but you'll get tired. There is a plethora of other good exercises, too, check out Crossfit and DragonDoor for more, both links are on my sidebar.

The article does have one good thing. The emphasis on form is critical. Good form leads to good reps leads to strength and healing. Invariably, bad form almost always leads to injury, be it large or small.
Something else I don't get though...They tell us that the brain saying to quit is really a safety measure to keep us from getting injured. Duh! Why circumvent this? If my body says it's time to quit, it's bloody time to quit!! I do this all the time. It's not being a wuss to admit that you aren't physically prepared to do something, it's realistic. Yeah, sure, you may be humbled, but what's the point of pushing on to an injury? (I had to learn this one the hard way.)
Of course, knowing the difference between "I'm tired/fatigued" and "I should not/can not continue" takes time and practice. It also takes patience. I learned the difference with martial arts. Some people learn it with running, some with lifting. The point is, there is a difference, and yes, you can push past fatigue, even extreme fatigue, but be prepared for the consequences.

I think my ranting is done for now. Adios!

Danny

Just another name? Just another face? Just another Hero!

What a powerful message...Go to Crossfit's site and read the comments. Today's WOD is dedicated to Sgt. 1st Class Daniel Crabtree, killed by an IED in Iraq last week.

When I saw the WOD and the dedication this morning, I had a brief moment of sadness. I've never met the guy or conversed with him in any way, but it still pained me to hear it. It didn't sink in very far though since work was calling.

Later on in the day I revisited the site and read the comments section...nearly everyone (at the time I read it) chose to forego WOD scores and instead posted something along the lines of "A grateful nation thanks you...." It was all I could do to not break down in the middle of the library.

"We sleep safe in our beds because rough men stand ready in the night to visit violence on those who would do us harm"---George Orwell

I can't help but pray that some day I will be counted worthy to stand ready. Maybe someday. Maybe.

Dreams of...

What do you dream about?

I dream about service. First to God, then my wife, then family and country. I dream about being able to defend them in times of danger, providing for them in times of need, celebrating with them in times of joy, and discipling and leading them, well, always.

I dream about achievements. I dream about what it would be like to serve in battle. I wonder (and sometimes worry) what fear would do to me there. I dream about what I'd have to do to be recognized as valuable to the organization I currently work for. I dream about writing a novel, article, story that will impact the person I'm writing for. I dream about becoming filthy rich as a novelist, leaving my job and wondering around in dangerous places saving people from the bad guys.

I dream about fears. In my worries are upcoming evaluations, the insecurities I feel while giving classroom instruction, the occasional fear that I've sinned so much God won't love me anymore.

I dream about fitness. What would it be like to finish an Ironman? 2.4 miles by swim, 112 miles by bicycle, 26.2 by foot? What about the Western States 100 footrace through the western mountains? What about the Badwater Footrace, 135 miles through Death Valley in the middle of summer, where it's so hot your shoes literally melt off your feet? What about snatching 135 lbs...with one hand? Or snatching that with both hands?

I dream about many things. Some are misplaced, results of sin, some are not. That's me.

Learning

G'day!

Right now I'm pretty much wasting time until I can wake up enough to study the Word a little bit before the activities of the day begin. I don't like to read much of it before I'm awake enough to comprehend what I'm reading...I feel like I'm disrespecting God to just skim over it and not give it the attention it deserves.

I've learned a lot (or it seems) about myself this past week/weekend. Normally, I don't get so excited about myself, but the learning curve is a steep one this time. I read from somewhere (Maybe C.S Lewis, G.K. Chesterton, or one of those fellows) that focusing one's learning on oneself is more dangerous than it is beneficial...We should keep our attentions focused on Christ, on the Lord God of the Bible, and let him reveal to us where we stand in relation to him. I agree. There's nothing wrong with self-reflection from time to time, and I don't think whatever author wrote that was saying there is, the difference is keeping your main focus on the Lord.

Last Friday, I ran 5.23 miles and did a killer workout afterwards. Saturday and Sunday I rested. Monday-Wednesday I worked out seven times; I ran, swam, and did Crossfit. I don't think I've ever pushed myself physically like that before. After doing that, doing a five mile run seems so easy on reflection. I've been resting the past couple of days, but now it's time to start again. I doubt I'll be doing the three-a-day routine but I'll get in a good one nonetheless. I've got swimming lessons later today, plus Crossfit, and I'm thinking about going and doing some mountain biking down at Draper (where all the dead bodies are). Nothing to serious, it's just fun and falls into the "sport" category of Crossfit (check the free issue on the website if you're unsure of what I mean). I'm so thankful to the Lord for giving me a healthy body. Life is fun!

Well, there's a little bit more but I'm awake now, and the Word is calling my name. Adios. Oh, Steve, I haven't forgotten about your comments... ;)

Yeah! Neat-O!

Lots of news today!

Today:

Run:
Untimed, appx 2.75 miles

Swim:
X4 lengths (appx 25m, little bit less) underwaters...three of four times I made it 3/4 way, made it all the way once
X4 lengths kick training (with the little floating board thing)
X2.5ish half-lengths stroke training
Little bit of bobbing, nothing to serious, just enough to help me get comfortable with being on the bottom and not having air.

WOD:
Started at 125, went to 155 (only on last DL)
X10, 9, 8, 7 Deadlift, Bench Press, Clean
At bodyweight appx 160-65ish, that's not good. I think I could have done more had I not already been tired, and I was concerned about causing serious injury to my knees/legs (they've taken a beating the past seven days!). Also, for the DL and clean I was more concerned about form than anything else. Bad form leads to weakness, injury and bad reps. Good form heals weakness, injury, and makes good reps. I saw a guy doing DL's right next to me...he would bend over at the waist, lift with his legs, and at the top he'd straighten out his back and actually lean backwards a little bit. Now that I think about it, I'm suprised his spine didn't snap off at the bottom and roll up like a window shade.
I also did some co-ordination/balance training on the adult playgrounds. Two rounds of things including monkey bars, pullups, balance beams, dip walking on the parallel bars, bear walking on the parallel bars, jumping onto posts, climbing poles, leg asissted muscle-ups, and a little bit of climbing. It was tiring but fun.

Yesterday:
Five rounds, for time:
Row 500m
15 knees-elbows
15 back extensions

I got to indoctrinate another friend/co-worker into the Crossfit regime. He loved it! Yeah baby, yeah! One more convert. I saw one of my ALS instructors today at the gym, we talked a bit about nutrition, education and our mutual dreams of being personal trainers. He's an awesome fellow.

Also had an interesting conversation at work about the gay marriage thing. I get so frustrated with myself sometimes...I could type out volumes of info and opinions in a written debate, but if you ask me to speak it, I'll completely lose track. I think that maybe I just get nervous talking with unbelievers about subjects that pertain to God, especially when I know that nearly everything I say is going to paint them as sinners. Well duh, sometimes it's supposed to, but I struggle with providing a Christ-like example in work, love and grace, and still proclaiming truth in the public arena. I don't want to deliver the message in a way that turns people off, and I don't have much practice with it. I'm grateful for the chance to hone conversational skills with people of differing views that can still be civil. I'm sure military law has something to do with the civil part, I know sometimes it does with me...but hey, it works.

New Day

It's been a fun day!!

I spent this morning trying to run my 5.23 mile course (finally measured it out). At about 2.5 I realized that my legs were so sore that to continue would risk injury from over-tight muscles. So, I walked back and then it was time to do the swim workout. My friend and now swim coach completely wore me out. I'm grateful to her for freely offering quality lessons. Later tonight (not much later though) is the next round of Crossfit. Three workouts in one day...I am so HUNGRY!!! GRRR!!!! I WANT SOME MORE FOOD!!!

Anyway, I've done history homework (just study at this point) and now I'm going to go soon so I can work out. Grace.

Hellfire and Brimstone

Sheesh.

I went to the other C&MA church this morning, and was not to impressed. I think the sermon was supposed to be on the Holy Spirit but either I wasn't paying much attention or the pastor never really got to the point. He seemed to busy looking at me and talking about salvation. Just because I'm a young guy and go to a Baptist church wearing blue jeans & t-shirt where the average age is 65+, does that mean I automatically need to be witnessed to?

The people were friendly, at least.

This is from www.reverendfun.com. Most of the cartoons are a little dumb, but I thought this was worth the trouble of posting.

SMACK!!! Right in the face!

(I'll warn you ahead of time, this is a long post....)

Num 22:20: And God came to Balaam at night and said to him, "If the men have come to call you, rise, go with them; but only do what I tell you."

Commentary from Matthew Henry's Commentary on the Whole Bible (Pertinent parts are in bold):
Num 22:15-21 -
We have here a second embassy sent to Balaam, to fetch him over to curse Israel. It were well for us if we were as earnest and constant in prosecuting a good work, notwithstanding disappointments, as Balak was in pursuing this ill design. The enemies of the church are restless and unwearied in their attempts against it; but he that sits in heaven laughs at them. Observe,
I. The temptation Balak laid before Balaam. He contrived to make this assault more vigorous than the former. It is very probable that he sent double money in the hands of his messengers; but, besides that, now he tempted him with honours, laid a bait not only for his covetousness, but for his pride and ambition. How earnestly should we beg of God daily to mortify in us these two limbs of the old man! Those that know how to look with a holy contempt upon worldly wealth and preferment will find it not so hard a matter as most men do to keep a good conscience. See how artfully Balak managed the temptation. 1. The messengers he sent were more, and more honourable, Num_22:15. He sent to this conjurer with as great respect and deference to his quality as if he had been a sovereign prince, apprehending perhaps that Balaam had thought himself slighted in the fewness and meanness of the former messengers. 2. The request was very urgent. This powerful prince becomes a suitor to him: "Let nothing, I pray thee, hinder thee (Num_22:16), no, not God, nor conscience, nor any fear either of sin or shame." 3. The proffers were high: "I will promote thee to very great honour among the princes of Moab;" nay, he gives him a blank, and he shall write his own terms: I will do whatsoever thou sayest, that is, "I will give thee whatever thou desirest, and observe whatever thou orderest; thy word shall be a law to me," Num_22:17. Thus sinners stick at no pains, spare no cost, and care not how low they stoop, for the gratifying either of their luxury or of their malice; shall we then be stiff and strait-handed in our compliance with the laws of virtue? God forbid.
II. Balaam's seeming resistance of, but real yielding to, this temptation. We may here discern in Balaam a struggle between his convictions and his corruptions. 1. His convictions charged him to adhere to the command of God, and he spoke their language, Num_22:18. Nor could any man have said better: "If Balak would give me his house full of silver and gold, and that is more than he can give or I can ask, I cannot go beyond the word of the Lord my God." See how honourably he speaks of God; he is Jehovah, my God. Note, Many call God theirs that are not his, not truly because not only his; they swear by the Lord, and by Malcham. See how respectfully he speaks of the word of God, as one resolved to stick to it, and in nothing to vary from it, and how slightly of the wealth of this world, as if gold and silver were nothing to him in comparison with the favour of God; and yet, at the same time, the searcher of hearts knew that he loved the wages of unrighteousness. Note, It is an easy thing for bad men to speak very good words, and with their mouth to make a show of piety. There is no judging of men by their words. God knows the heart. 2. His corruptions at the same time strongly inclined him to go contrary to the command. He seemed to refuse the temptation, Num_22:18. But even then he expressed no abhorrence of it, as Christ did when he had the kingdoms of the world offered him (Get thee hence Satan), and as Peter did when Simon Magus offered him money: Thy money perish with thee. But it appears (Num_22:19) that he had a strong inclination to accept the proffer; for he would further attend, to know what God would say to him, hoping that he might alter his mind and give him leave to go. This was a vile reflection upon God Almighty, as if he could change his mind, and now at last suffer those to be cursed whom he had pronounced blessed, and as if he would be brought to allow what he had already declared to be evil. Surely he thought God altogether such a one as himself. He had already been told what the will of God was, in which he ought to have acquiesced, and not to have desired a re-hearing of that cause which was already so plainly determined. Note, It is a very great affront to God, and a certain evidence of the dominion of corruption in the heart, to beg leave to sin.
III. The permission God gave him to go, Num_22:20. God came to him, probably by an anger, and told him he might, if he pleased, go with Balak's messengers. So he gave him up to his own heart's lust. "Since thou hast such a mind to go, even go, yet know that the journey thou undertakest shall not be for thy honour; for, though thou hast leave to go, thou shalt not, as thou hopest, have leave to curse, for the word which I shall say unto thee, that thou shalt do." Note, God has wicked men in a chain; hitherto they shall come by his permission, but no further that he does permit them. Thus he makes the wrath of man to praise him, yet, at the same time, restrains the remainder of it. It was in anger that God said to Balaam, "Go with them," and we have reason to think that Balaam himself so understood it, for we do not find him pleading this allowance when God reproved him for going. Note, As God sometimes denies the prayers of his people in love, so sometimes he grants the desires of the wicked in wrath.
IV. His setting out in the journey, Num_22:21. God gave him leave to go if the men called him, but he was so fond of the journey that we do not find he staid for their calling him, but he himself rose up in the morning, got every thing ready with all speed, and went with the princes of Moab, who were proud enough that they had carried their point. The apostle describes Balaam's sin here to be that he ran greedily into an error for reward, Jud_1:11. The love of money is the root of all evil.

A while back I was praying over tithes since I don't belong to a local congregation. I prayed and I felt the Lord leading me to something that I'm unfamiliar with...spend it to purchase something. A laptop computer.
I've been directed to give tithes differently before (like to people who are in serious need), but that was only occasionally. The biblical support for that came in the idea that in the OT tithes were offered to the Lord in the Temple and the priests were allowed to keep certain portions of the tithes as an income (for survival more than riches, I think). In the NT, I hear that all believers are considered a holy priesthood, and so when the idea of giving to a person in need (specifically a Christian) came to mind, I prayed, God blessed it, and I did it. I think the idea came from God anyway.
This was the first time I'd been directed to use a tithe for something I would be using. I'd known that I'd wanted a computer for a long time, but hadn't thought about it in forever, since I couldn't justify the expense by any needs.
When I felt the Holy Spirit directing me this way, I immediately went into "this is the enemy" mode, even though I felt the prescence of God affirming it whenever I earnestly seeked him about tithes. (Say what you want about feelings...there is still a distinct difference in what people feel and what the presence of holiness feels like.)
So eventually I started praying about the computer. My biggest concern from the begining, and to now, is that I would fall into the habit of spending the tithe on what I wanted, whenever I wanted, and claiming it was God. Making sure that my heart stayed open to giving tithes and offerings above the tithe (which I'm not very good at) was the most important thing to me. I fasted over this, and then purchased a computer.
I can't even begin to describe the blessings that have come from this one piece of equipment. The weekend after buying the computer I sent an email to a gorgeous blond/brunette (depending on the sun). I've been able to start classes, work on projects the Lord has layed on my heart for a long time, keep in touch with friends and all kinds of things. I've tried hard to use the computer in a way that honors Him. The doubts continue though. Every now and then I'll think about it and fear my selfishness. Last night I read the verse from Numbers and the commentary and immediatley thought of this, and freaked out.
As I was sitting down after dry-heaving, wondering if I should continue or quit, I finally broke and started praying some more about this, almost in tears. I confessed my selfishness and admitted that I could have been wrong.
God met me there in the gym and re-affirmed the decision. Almost immediately (though I know it was probably just timing, still it was incredible timing) 'God of Hope' began playing on my mp3 player and I started worshiping and then continued the workout.
Even after, I went to the sauna and spent nearly a half-hour in constant prayer...what a night. I'd have spent more but I was reaching the critical stages of dehydration...bad news. So I went home.

Set this hope in me,
Set this hope in me
That I may be pure and holy
That I may be like You only
That I may be completely free
Though You slay me I will hope
Hope inspires my endurance
Your hope is my anchor
God of hope fill me

Uhhh...it hurts....

Yesterday's run:
5.15 (maybe a little more) miles, 48ish minutes

20 min rest, prep for WOD

Yesterday's WOD:
50 Box jump, 24 inch box
50 Jumping pull-ups
50 Kettlebell swings, 1 pood
Walking Lunge, 50 steps
50 Knees to elbows
50 Push press, 45 pounds
50 Back extensions
50 Wall ball shots, 20 pound ball
50 Burpees
50 Double unders
=75 mins

I had to sub 20 lb wall ball with 45lb pushpress & 50 double unders with 50 jumps. At number 20 on the burpees I had to shuffle over to the bathroom and dry heave for a while. That rest cost me a good 10 minutes at least, but by the grace of God (and that alone) I was able to finish.