Dear Lord,
You have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise. You are familiar with my goings and comings, you know my ways better than I. You guard my heart and shield my mind in ways that I cannot see, much less comprehend.
Father, please do not abandon me now. Where is your Holy Spirit, that I may worship you? Where is your table, that I may eat? Where is your water, that I may drink?
Father, I have tried to keep your Words but have utterly failed. I am a glutton, a thief and a liar. There is no honest way within me, even what I call love is something that dishonors you.
Lord, please heal me from my evil ways. Please soothe my troubled mind and heal my torn soul. All of my wounds are self-inflicted and when I try to patch them they bleed faster.
Create in my a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.
Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.
Then I will teach transgressors your ways and sinners will turn back to you.
--excerpts from Psalm 51 (NIV)
Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?
Saturday, December 31, 2005
I'm better now
Okay, so I guess an outburst was coming. After all that stress, I really need to go injure myself at the gym or something. It's really frustrating to see life fall apart at the seams.
As I scrolled through the blog to make sure everything updated correctly, I ran across Psalm 23 again. I think that says it all, in a way that only God can describe.
"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want...."
Even now I can feel the presence of the Holy Spirit healing my ache. How much more? How much longer will I be trapped on this earth?
Change of subject. Sometime in the near future I'll be blogging a story, just something to practice on, really. As soon as I actually get it started (and figure out how to post it without taking up a bunch of space) you'll see it. Any comments are appreciated.
Well, I guess that's that.
Dan
(p.s. - the picture is titled "Leap of Faith." Figured it was appropriate.
Congratulations, I suck
Ever had one of those days where nothing can go right? Where everything you were planning for (and needed!) fell away like so much chaff? I just did.
The interest-free loan for my truck failed to go through, probably because of someone's negligence (other than mine, that is). I only found this out after calling the people and asking about it. Up till now I was under the impression that the repairs would be covered. The high-interest loan I would have tried to get I couldn't because the credit union is closed (even though the holiday hours sign says they are supposed to be open). I may have accidentaly broken a part on the loaner truck that somebody generously offered while my vehicle was getting fixed.
That's the funny part. All the work that needs to be done on my truck is complete, I just can't pay for it. I hope the dealership doesn't try to sue me.
And you know what else? I still can't get a girlfriend. Not that I have anything to offer her at the moment anyway, everything I own wouldn't pay off the debt I've accrued in the past two weeks.
DINGDINGDING!!! Guess who wins the suck prize today?
The interest-free loan for my truck failed to go through, probably because of someone's negligence (other than mine, that is). I only found this out after calling the people and asking about it. Up till now I was under the impression that the repairs would be covered. The high-interest loan I would have tried to get I couldn't because the credit union is closed (even though the holiday hours sign says they are supposed to be open). I may have accidentaly broken a part on the loaner truck that somebody generously offered while my vehicle was getting fixed.
That's the funny part. All the work that needs to be done on my truck is complete, I just can't pay for it. I hope the dealership doesn't try to sue me.
And you know what else? I still can't get a girlfriend. Not that I have anything to offer her at the moment anyway, everything I own wouldn't pay off the debt I've accrued in the past two weeks.
DINGDINGDING!!! Guess who wins the suck prize today?
Friday, December 30, 2005
This says it all
The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters,
he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.
Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me
Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.
Thursday, December 29, 2005
To deep for words
So what exactly is the point of all of this anyway?Why were we created with desires and longings that are perpetually just out of reach?
It's like climbing a wall and seeing the next hold only an inch out of your longest stretch. If you jump for it, it may not be a good hold. If you fall, all the hard work you've done up to this point is naught and you start over again. But if you catch it and pull yourself up, straining the whole way and praying your grip doesn't fail, oh the glory of that moment! The passion of the struggle and the fear of failure is worth knowing that out the most difficult trials victory was born and you are triumphant against your adversaries.
Or maybe the passion of the struggle is the point. Maybe the effort to reach the next hold is just as important as the hold itself. Or maybe you just whack your hand on the way up and wonder, "What is the point of all of this?"
Grace,
Dan
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
What the crap is that????
As I watched a movie last night, one of the villains started spewing out Bible verses. They were all out of context and twisted in ways that I don't care to repeat. I'm getting sick and tired of hearing Hollywood mouth off to Christianity, either deliberately or "accidentally," if there is such a thing. Heck, it's one thing when a movie villain starts blaspheming God or the Word because at least you know he's the bad guy and bad guys do that. What about when the good guys do it? Then it is insidious, because it's usually funny and it gets people laughing about sin. After I caught myself laughing at one of these moments I thought, "What is God thinking about this? Does he agree with the general sentiment of what is being said? What are people who don't know the truth thinking about this? Are they going to be driven from the Faith because of a movie?"
Does fiction affect someone who is not a Christian? Does it affect someone who is a Christian?
HECK YES!!!!!
Here's an example: Let's say you've got a kid growing up without much fatherly input. Now let's say you've got a kid who is grounded all the time and can't go anywhere. Now let's say you've got a kid that loves to read fantasy novels. (What percentage of people is this? When I worked as a youth leader, this described at least 2-3 out of every ten students. It describes me, as a matter of fact.) The kid is reading about witches and warlocks and people with supernatural powers, or dragons and wardrobes and hobbits, or wizards and kingdoms and long-lost ancestral inheritances. Pretty soon that kid, especially if he is male, starts to wish that part of what he is reading is true, at least for him. Not to long after that, he starts to pretend it is true. Fast forward a few years: Not only does he believe it, but now he's playing with Tarot cards and "conversing with spirits", if you will.
The problem here isn't that he read fiction, specifically fantasy. C.S. Lewis, J.R.R Tolkien, L.B. Graham and G.P. Taylor are great examples of Christian fantasy writers that offer an excellent assortment of literature to choose from. I hope to join their ranks one day as well. The problem is that with so many lies and half-truths out there, no one took the time to show this kid the truth. (Of course, when someone finally did, he decided to blog about it many years later.... :)) No one loved (think of love as a verb here) enough to sit him down and give him what was real, which is more incredible and fantastic than anything in a fiction novel to date.
Can fiction effect someone who is a Christian? Remember me laughing about sin in the movie? Need I say more? Or are you immune to it? ( I could go on for hours on this one, but that's enough for now I think.
So, I've decided to examine the movies I watch a little closer and blog about them afterwards. I hope to offer something like a Christian movie review thingy, though they won't be rated, just examined; and of course I'll try to point out fallacies and truths within the 1-2.5 hours of my life sitting in a dark room watching TV (didn't my mom say something about that?).
I hope this dragon isn't to big for a hobbit.
Dan
Does fiction affect someone who is not a Christian? Does it affect someone who is a Christian?
HECK YES!!!!!
Here's an example: Let's say you've got a kid growing up without much fatherly input. Now let's say you've got a kid who is grounded all the time and can't go anywhere. Now let's say you've got a kid that loves to read fantasy novels. (What percentage of people is this? When I worked as a youth leader, this described at least 2-3 out of every ten students. It describes me, as a matter of fact.) The kid is reading about witches and warlocks and people with supernatural powers, or dragons and wardrobes and hobbits, or wizards and kingdoms and long-lost ancestral inheritances. Pretty soon that kid, especially if he is male, starts to wish that part of what he is reading is true, at least for him. Not to long after that, he starts to pretend it is true. Fast forward a few years: Not only does he believe it, but now he's playing with Tarot cards and "conversing with spirits", if you will.
The problem here isn't that he read fiction, specifically fantasy. C.S. Lewis, J.R.R Tolkien, L.B. Graham and G.P. Taylor are great examples of Christian fantasy writers that offer an excellent assortment of literature to choose from. I hope to join their ranks one day as well. The problem is that with so many lies and half-truths out there, no one took the time to show this kid the truth. (Of course, when someone finally did, he decided to blog about it many years later.... :)) No one loved (think of love as a verb here) enough to sit him down and give him what was real, which is more incredible and fantastic than anything in a fiction novel to date.
Can fiction effect someone who is a Christian? Remember me laughing about sin in the movie? Need I say more? Or are you immune to it? ( I could go on for hours on this one, but that's enough for now I think.
So, I've decided to examine the movies I watch a little closer and blog about them afterwards. I hope to offer something like a Christian movie review thingy, though they won't be rated, just examined; and of course I'll try to point out fallacies and truths within the 1-2.5 hours of my life sitting in a dark room watching TV (didn't my mom say something about that?).
I hope this dragon isn't to big for a hobbit.
Dan
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
The Pleasure of Pain
Some things have been marinating in my cranium over the past few days.
On a more or less daily basis, I enjoy a dynamic and semi-life-threatening workout from a great fitness program called CrossFit (http://www.crossfit.com). I've been doing this for a while and have noticed an incredible growth in my strength and conditioning. There is one down side to it though...it can kill you. I read an article in the NY Times titled "Getting Fit Even if It Kills You"about this favored program and can't help but ponder the idiocies of the American media.
True, CrossFit is potentially dangerous. True, the guy in the article did almost die. True, I'm more scared of crossing the street in rush hour than I am of killing myself in a workout. If the author of this article had bothered to do the research, she would know that a good portion of her insinuations and statements (no education for newbies, no emphasis on technique, no safety whatsoever) is hogwash.
How often does something come along that requires hard work, effort, and ethics? I'm not just talking about CrossFit, though that is my focal point at the moment. I guess I could go to a gym where they tell me to do 3-5 sets of 10 on four different machines and I'll be good for the day, but I'd rather put in the work, sweat, and puke to do something that will change my life for the better.
I could do the machines, run the treadmill, and get dead as a drunk driver slams into me. I could fall down the stairs in a dark movie theater. Some things are worth hurting for. Some things are worth paying for. Some things are worth dying for (though that may be outside the realm of exercise, but you get my point.) Why is pain such a bad thing, anyway?
On a more or less daily basis, I enjoy a dynamic and semi-life-threatening workout from a great fitness program called CrossFit (http://www.crossfit.com). I've been doing this for a while and have noticed an incredible growth in my strength and conditioning. There is one down side to it though...it can kill you. I read an article in the NY Times titled "Getting Fit Even if It Kills You"about this favored program and can't help but ponder the idiocies of the American media.
True, CrossFit is potentially dangerous. True, the guy in the article did almost die. True, I'm more scared of crossing the street in rush hour than I am of killing myself in a workout. If the author of this article had bothered to do the research, she would know that a good portion of her insinuations and statements (no education for newbies, no emphasis on technique, no safety whatsoever) is hogwash.
How often does something come along that requires hard work, effort, and ethics? I'm not just talking about CrossFit, though that is my focal point at the moment. I guess I could go to a gym where they tell me to do 3-5 sets of 10 on four different machines and I'll be good for the day, but I'd rather put in the work, sweat, and puke to do something that will change my life for the better.
I could do the machines, run the treadmill, and get dead as a drunk driver slams into me. I could fall down the stairs in a dark movie theater. Some things are worth hurting for. Some things are worth paying for. Some things are worth dying for (though that may be outside the realm of exercise, but you get my point.) Why is pain such a bad thing, anyway?
Geared Up
I was climbing with a friend not to long ago and we got on the discussion of all the gear necessary for the sport, and how you could compare it to a walk of faith in real life. Here's a couple of my favorite observations:
Jesus is your rope! Without the rope binding two people together and keeping you safe, you will fall.
The belayer is another believer who has already gone through your struggles and can help you in the place where you are at the moment.
Jesus is the Rock (imagine that?) because without good hand and footholds, you're not going anywhere.
Note - nearly all of these are not my ideas, they were hers. It was only after the "passion" experience that I realized without good holds I'm not going anywhere. What kinda dufus am I anyway? :P
Jesus is your rope! Without the rope binding two people together and keeping you safe, you will fall.
The belayer is another believer who has already gone through your struggles and can help you in the place where you are at the moment.
Jesus is the Rock (imagine that?) because without good hand and footholds, you're not going anywhere.
Note - nearly all of these are not my ideas, they were hers. It was only after the "passion" experience that I realized without good holds I'm not going anywhere. What kinda dufus am I anyway? :P
Friday, December 23, 2005
Beggars Among Us (part 2)
After I got out and looked at the truck, I was thinking it would still be okay. God had brought me this far and he will carry me through...now I should call friends and roadside assistance to get the ball rolling. I pulled the cell phone out and looked at the screen.
No service.
Well, only respectable hobbits don't have adventures, anyway.
So, I packed some necessities in my Pursuit 50 (climbing pack made by McEwings) and headed off down the road. I typed a text message and sent it to everyone I could think of, knowing the phone would automatically send the messages when there was service. God has his ways. Only about 100 yards away I started getting phone calls and text messages from friends.
It is now three days later, and I am completely humbled and suprised by the reaction of the people around me. Well, not suprised, but certainly humbled. Every single day I have seen obvious signs of God working his "deep magic" to provide for what I need. The sacrifices I see being made on my behalf point straight to the love of Christ and it's sometimes all I can do to not be overwhelmed by the generosity of his people.
At the front of my mind the past few days is how the King of Glory, the one who made it all and owns it all, gave away more than I could ever imagine just to save my sin-filled soul. Hallelujah!
Dan
No service.
Well, only respectable hobbits don't have adventures, anyway.
So, I packed some necessities in my Pursuit 50 (climbing pack made by McEwings) and headed off down the road. I typed a text message and sent it to everyone I could think of, knowing the phone would automatically send the messages when there was service. God has his ways. Only about 100 yards away I started getting phone calls and text messages from friends.
It is now three days later, and I am completely humbled and suprised by the reaction of the people around me. Well, not suprised, but certainly humbled. Every single day I have seen obvious signs of God working his "deep magic" to provide for what I need. The sacrifices I see being made on my behalf point straight to the love of Christ and it's sometimes all I can do to not be overwhelmed by the generosity of his people.
At the front of my mind the past few days is how the King of Glory, the one who made it all and owns it all, gave away more than I could ever imagine just to save my sin-filled soul. Hallelujah!
Dan
Thursday, December 22, 2005
Beggars Among Us
I was rolling down the interstate on my way home when it happened.
As my truck pushed up a hill at 75 mph the engine suddenly quit. Shocked, I watched all of the meters wind down to nearly zero in less than a second. The semi traffic behind me was catching up fast, and I had to cross the next lane and get onto the shoulder. This safely done, I realized that my coasting brought me down one hill and half way up the side of another. The truck slowed, stopped, and started rolling backwards. The brakes weren't working!! My last idea was the E-brake. I thought, Lord, please let this brake work, because if you don't I'm a goner.
God answers prayers. It worked.
more to follow....
As my truck pushed up a hill at 75 mph the engine suddenly quit. Shocked, I watched all of the meters wind down to nearly zero in less than a second. The semi traffic behind me was catching up fast, and I had to cross the next lane and get onto the shoulder. This safely done, I realized that my coasting brought me down one hill and half way up the side of another. The truck slowed, stopped, and started rolling backwards. The brakes weren't working!! My last idea was the E-brake. I thought, Lord, please let this brake work, because if you don't I'm a goner.
God answers prayers. It worked.
more to follow....
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
An Alternate Translation
Top o' the morning to ya.
Last night I found myself clinging to the side of a cliff for dear life. I looked down at the certain death waiting below me and suddenly had an epiphany.
Ok, so it's not that dramatic. I was about 50 feet up the side of a wall in an indoor climbing gym and out of the blue a bolt of inspiration struck. I wasn't even looking down when it hit, I was trying not to think of the pain my harness was going to cause if I jumped for another hold and missed (being short occasionally has certain disadvantages).
What is passion?
Well, since I'm not a biblical scholar or anything (though I did do a word search for "passion" at gospelcom.net, that counts for something, right?) I'm just going to take this idea and run with it.
passion = death
Think about it. I've been told that the old definition of passion is "suffering." Don't really know what the context is, but it does sound heady and theological in titles like "The Passion of the Christ." Not that I'm poking fun at the movie, but when you don't really know anything, everything has a mysterious, deep meaning that only you can understand. (Guess I'm showing my ignorance....)
I think it is safe to say that Jesus was passionate, in all definitions of the word, even though the word search didn't reveal any clues. He suffered and he died, and tells us to be like him, so theoretically we are supposed to be passionate, too.
You know, that just doesn't sound very appetizing right now. "Excuse me, waiter, there's a corpse in my soup, can I have another bowl?" I'm not saying we should all want to be dead. I don't think Jesus was saying that, either. I do think, and the word search agrees, that we should be willing to give our everything for Jesus' sake. All the references I found to passion had to deal with being renewed in our hearts and ways of thinking and not only giving up, but removing the old, sinful ways. ("Why, sir, you are the corpse in your soup. How can I fix that?")
This reminds me of C.S. Lewis's secret of joy, paraphrased. Feel free to correct me if you know otherwise. He always said that joy is longing, it is the terrible ache we feel so deep it is a part of our psyche. I agree. Perhaps that is the feeling we get when we are passionate...a terrible and deep longing for what really truly is fulfilling, or better, or right, or true, or maybe even just nice. I think it can also be perverted when taken outside the context of Christ and his love, as can all things.
So I looked at the hold, looked down at the cute Christian girl who was belaying me, and decided to be passionate. It's a good thing cute Christian girls are good belayers, cause I sure did fall and nearly popped my spleen. Ok, so maybe I was just trying to show off...but I still think passion is synonymous with death. Thankfully, in this case, to die is to live!! What are your thoughts?
Dan
Last night I found myself clinging to the side of a cliff for dear life. I looked down at the certain death waiting below me and suddenly had an epiphany.
Ok, so it's not that dramatic. I was about 50 feet up the side of a wall in an indoor climbing gym and out of the blue a bolt of inspiration struck. I wasn't even looking down when it hit, I was trying not to think of the pain my harness was going to cause if I jumped for another hold and missed (being short occasionally has certain disadvantages).
What is passion?
Well, since I'm not a biblical scholar or anything (though I did do a word search for "passion" at gospelcom.net, that counts for something, right?) I'm just going to take this idea and run with it.
passion = death
Think about it. I've been told that the old definition of passion is "suffering." Don't really know what the context is, but it does sound heady and theological in titles like "The Passion of the Christ." Not that I'm poking fun at the movie, but when you don't really know anything, everything has a mysterious, deep meaning that only you can understand. (Guess I'm showing my ignorance....)
I think it is safe to say that Jesus was passionate, in all definitions of the word, even though the word search didn't reveal any clues. He suffered and he died, and tells us to be like him, so theoretically we are supposed to be passionate, too.
You know, that just doesn't sound very appetizing right now. "Excuse me, waiter, there's a corpse in my soup, can I have another bowl?" I'm not saying we should all want to be dead. I don't think Jesus was saying that, either. I do think, and the word search agrees, that we should be willing to give our everything for Jesus' sake. All the references I found to passion had to deal with being renewed in our hearts and ways of thinking and not only giving up, but removing the old, sinful ways. ("Why, sir, you are the corpse in your soup. How can I fix that?")
This reminds me of C.S. Lewis's secret of joy, paraphrased. Feel free to correct me if you know otherwise. He always said that joy is longing, it is the terrible ache we feel so deep it is a part of our psyche. I agree. Perhaps that is the feeling we get when we are passionate...a terrible and deep longing for what really truly is fulfilling, or better, or right, or true, or maybe even just nice. I think it can also be perverted when taken outside the context of Christ and his love, as can all things.
So I looked at the hold, looked down at the cute Christian girl who was belaying me, and decided to be passionate. It's a good thing cute Christian girls are good belayers, cause I sure did fall and nearly popped my spleen. Ok, so maybe I was just trying to show off...but I still think passion is synonymous with death. Thankfully, in this case, to die is to live!! What are your thoughts?
Dan
Saturday, December 17, 2005
Close Call
I was playing Airsoft with some people a couple of weeks ago and had an interesting experience. In case you don't know, Airsoft is like paintball except the guns are modeled after real firearms and they fire plastic BB's.
My team consisted of four people. We had a five minute walk to our "base" and began setting up positions to defend it, since the other team was supposed to attack. All of that was fine and dandy until we got there and realized there was no cover. In the summertime the place would have been an excellent base, but in the dead of winter all of our cover died off.
We sat around talking for a few minutes, trying to decide what to do. Finally one guy got fed up and decided that he was going to hide in a little foxhole about five yards outside "camp," and could somebody cover him since he can't see the enemy coming? (It's actually not as silly as it sounds, the place he picked was pretty good. He just needed someone to let him know when to sit up and fire.) The rest of us him-hawed around, and I finally volunteered. The other two guys beat feet to thier position, perhaps 10-15 yards away and behind some nice cover.
I walked around for a couple of minutes looking for a nice place to lay and realized the only place possible was out in the open behind an old tree. I nearly decided to go off to the other fellows and got an integrity check...I'd said that I would cover this guy, so I went behind the tree and squirmed into the ground as much as possible. There was no way the other team wouldn't be able to see and shoot me. No way.
About five minutes later a face poked it's way through a thicket on the other side of the "base." The airsoft gun I was using had a scope on it and I got to watch up close as two members of the other team came creeping out of the brush and looked around for us. One guy looked right at me but apparently didn't see the rifle pointed at him.
I put the crosshairs on the chest of the first guy and squeezed the trigger. Nothing happened! I felt down for the safety and realized that I left it on. By the time this was corrected he was almost to close to shoot, so I let the other guy have it. My team member in the foxhole jumped up and took out the first guy. Exciting stuff!
It's funny how God uses little things like this to teach. I reflected on this afterwards and a suprising lesson emerged. The place I layed down did not offer much for concealment and even less for cover. I was sitting there thinking that the moment someone came through the thicket I was going to be tagged. Not only did that not happen, but our team actually won!
I was reminded of Matthew 10:39 : "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." (NIV)
I was reminded of the willingness in my heart to do everything that I know is wrong, and the reluctance to surrender my will to God's.
I wonder about that sometimes. Why is it so hard to do something that is God's will when it is so obviously the best thing that can be done??? Why am I so stubborn and resistant to doing what He wants? Anyway, just random thoughts. Adios.
Dan
My team consisted of four people. We had a five minute walk to our "base" and began setting up positions to defend it, since the other team was supposed to attack. All of that was fine and dandy until we got there and realized there was no cover. In the summertime the place would have been an excellent base, but in the dead of winter all of our cover died off.
We sat around talking for a few minutes, trying to decide what to do. Finally one guy got fed up and decided that he was going to hide in a little foxhole about five yards outside "camp," and could somebody cover him since he can't see the enemy coming? (It's actually not as silly as it sounds, the place he picked was pretty good. He just needed someone to let him know when to sit up and fire.) The rest of us him-hawed around, and I finally volunteered. The other two guys beat feet to thier position, perhaps 10-15 yards away and behind some nice cover.
I walked around for a couple of minutes looking for a nice place to lay and realized the only place possible was out in the open behind an old tree. I nearly decided to go off to the other fellows and got an integrity check...I'd said that I would cover this guy, so I went behind the tree and squirmed into the ground as much as possible. There was no way the other team wouldn't be able to see and shoot me. No way.
About five minutes later a face poked it's way through a thicket on the other side of the "base." The airsoft gun I was using had a scope on it and I got to watch up close as two members of the other team came creeping out of the brush and looked around for us. One guy looked right at me but apparently didn't see the rifle pointed at him.
I put the crosshairs on the chest of the first guy and squeezed the trigger. Nothing happened! I felt down for the safety and realized that I left it on. By the time this was corrected he was almost to close to shoot, so I let the other guy have it. My team member in the foxhole jumped up and took out the first guy. Exciting stuff!
It's funny how God uses little things like this to teach. I reflected on this afterwards and a suprising lesson emerged. The place I layed down did not offer much for concealment and even less for cover. I was sitting there thinking that the moment someone came through the thicket I was going to be tagged. Not only did that not happen, but our team actually won!
I was reminded of Matthew 10:39 : "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." (NIV)
I was reminded of the willingness in my heart to do everything that I know is wrong, and the reluctance to surrender my will to God's.
I wonder about that sometimes. Why is it so hard to do something that is God's will when it is so obviously the best thing that can be done??? Why am I so stubborn and resistant to doing what He wants? Anyway, just random thoughts. Adios.
Dan
Thursday, December 15, 2005
The Lost Convoy
G'day.
I've been reading Black Hawk Down, a book about the Army Rangers, the Delta Force and their experiences in 1993 Mogadishu. It's the book the movie was based from. If you haven't read it and enjoy war stories, this is the one to read...just know that in some ways it is even more violent than the movie.
In the book (and movie), a convoy of Rangers and Delta operators are tasked to drive through the city of Mogadishu, Somalia to pick up some other troops that had to capture everyone inside a building deep in the heart of the city where anti-American sentiment was at is fiercest. This convoy was also tasked with rescuing the downed helos after they crashed. During the completion of this mission the Somalies built enormous roadblocks that caused the convoy to get temporarily lost. Imagine that. Lost in a firefight.
At first they had a relativley normal mission, but after a while it turned into a hellish firefight with over 1 million armed Somalies. One million. There were about 150 American soldiers. That's 6666.666 to one. Over 1300 Somalies died during the next day and a half, and 50% of this convoy were either killed, incapacitated or mutilated in terrifying and horrendous ways.
After finishing the documentary part of the book, my emtions were near drained. It's easy for me to place myself in the heart of the battle as a participant rather than observer. I was terrified when they were, happy when they were, and grieved when they were.
Then I started thinking about this lost convoy. Did you know some of those Rangers and Delta operators went into Mogadishu three times to rescue friends? Triple the odds - 19999.98 to one. One time three enemy grenades were dropped on a friendly position and all were duds. There were times that rounds tore clothing but never penetrated skin. Incredible.
The ultimate story is about two Delta snipers that begged to be put on the ground outside a downed BlackHawk so they could protect the injured aircrew. These men could see tens of thousands of angry citizens rushing toward the crash site to capture, maim and kill the crewmembers. The request was granted, and they went in. Before they went in, they knew that neither of them carried enough ammunition to fend off the crowd for long. Before they went in, both knew that any other help was not likely to come, at least for a very long time. Before they went in, they both knew they would probably die. But they went anyway.
When I read a story like this I feel so grateful for a God who knew, before he went in, what it would take for him to redeem me. And he went anyway.
Grace,
Danny
I've been reading Black Hawk Down, a book about the Army Rangers, the Delta Force and their experiences in 1993 Mogadishu. It's the book the movie was based from. If you haven't read it and enjoy war stories, this is the one to read...just know that in some ways it is even more violent than the movie.
In the book (and movie), a convoy of Rangers and Delta operators are tasked to drive through the city of Mogadishu, Somalia to pick up some other troops that had to capture everyone inside a building deep in the heart of the city where anti-American sentiment was at is fiercest. This convoy was also tasked with rescuing the downed helos after they crashed. During the completion of this mission the Somalies built enormous roadblocks that caused the convoy to get temporarily lost. Imagine that. Lost in a firefight.
At first they had a relativley normal mission, but after a while it turned into a hellish firefight with over 1 million armed Somalies. One million. There were about 150 American soldiers. That's 6666.666 to one. Over 1300 Somalies died during the next day and a half, and 50% of this convoy were either killed, incapacitated or mutilated in terrifying and horrendous ways.
After finishing the documentary part of the book, my emtions were near drained. It's easy for me to place myself in the heart of the battle as a participant rather than observer. I was terrified when they were, happy when they were, and grieved when they were.
Then I started thinking about this lost convoy. Did you know some of those Rangers and Delta operators went into Mogadishu three times to rescue friends? Triple the odds - 19999.98 to one. One time three enemy grenades were dropped on a friendly position and all were duds. There were times that rounds tore clothing but never penetrated skin. Incredible.
The ultimate story is about two Delta snipers that begged to be put on the ground outside a downed BlackHawk so they could protect the injured aircrew. These men could see tens of thousands of angry citizens rushing toward the crash site to capture, maim and kill the crewmembers. The request was granted, and they went in. Before they went in, they knew that neither of them carried enough ammunition to fend off the crowd for long. Before they went in, both knew that any other help was not likely to come, at least for a very long time. Before they went in, they both knew they would probably die. But they went anyway.
When I read a story like this I feel so grateful for a God who knew, before he went in, what it would take for him to redeem me. And he went anyway.
Grace,
Danny
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Another day in the Neighborhood
Good afternoon!
Whew...I'm worn out at the moment. After doing a slightly modified WOD from Crossfit (less weight and added pull-ups), my body was pretty tired. Then I decided to do squadron PT just for fun. We did a long list of cals and a little bit of running. My upper body is so tired it's twitching. Since tommorrow is a rest day for Crossfit and I missed yesterday's, I think I'll go with a LSD run tommorrow, maybe 5-6 miles. We'll see.
Grace,
Danny
Monday, December 12, 2005
Kings and Kings
G'day.
Another day. Not good or bad. Just another day.
Today I was reading an article about the main cast of The Chronicles of Narnia and felt a little bitter. I saw a picture of Peter in the midst of battle, trying to not get parts chopped off and wondered, why couldn't that be me?
Not that I actually enjoy people trying to kill me. It's just that Peter is out there fighting for something good; and if he wins, he gets to rule a kingdom. Hmmm. Not to mention he gets to see Aslan. I'd let a part be chopped off I could see Aslan. Of course, if you go by the imagery I get to "see" Aslan every day. I just don't think that would be the same as getting walloped by a big paw (which is probably what he'd do the first time he saw me), and then getting to sit with him a while and talk about the deep magic from beyond the beginning of the world. That, I think, would be worth eternity.
Another day. Not good or bad. Just another day.
Today I was reading an article about the main cast of The Chronicles of Narnia and felt a little bitter. I saw a picture of Peter in the midst of battle, trying to not get parts chopped off and wondered, why couldn't that be me?
Not that I actually enjoy people trying to kill me. It's just that Peter is out there fighting for something good; and if he wins, he gets to rule a kingdom. Hmmm. Not to mention he gets to see Aslan. I'd let a part be chopped off I could see Aslan. Of course, if you go by the imagery I get to "see" Aslan every day. I just don't think that would be the same as getting walloped by a big paw (which is probably what he'd do the first time he saw me), and then getting to sit with him a while and talk about the deep magic from beyond the beginning of the world. That, I think, would be worth eternity.
Saturday, December 10, 2005
What's a title for, anyway?
So while I'm sitting here wondering what I should title the first post on my brand-new blog, the question struck me. What's a title for, anyway? Why do we need titles? I mean, think about it. In a job description, how often does the title tell you what the job is really about? I.E. - Librarian. Sounds simple and straightforward, right? Just put on some casual clothes, show up for work and check out books to people. It doesn't say anything about the smelly boy that gets upset because his favorite Hardy Boys book is checked out. Nor anything about the family with eight screaming children that run around toppling bookshelves. The application form should have said Librarian/Prison Guard.
The more I think about it, the deeper it gets. Think about God for example. He's got a lot of titles like King, Saviour, Master, Teacher, etc. The only difference is this: his titles mean what they say. I think we're just to afraid to think about it sometimes...we can say God is King until he tells us to do something. Especially something that is going to cost us. Thank heavens he's also Saviour, too.
Anyway, random thoughts. Didn't mean to preach, my words just took a life of thier own.
Grace,
Dan
The more I think about it, the deeper it gets. Think about God for example. He's got a lot of titles like King, Saviour, Master, Teacher, etc. The only difference is this: his titles mean what they say. I think we're just to afraid to think about it sometimes...we can say God is King until he tells us to do something. Especially something that is going to cost us. Thank heavens he's also Saviour, too.
Anyway, random thoughts. Didn't mean to preach, my words just took a life of thier own.
Grace,
Dan
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