The only thing left to say

Dear Lord,

You have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise. You are familiar with my goings and comings, you know my ways better than I. You guard my heart and shield my mind in ways that I cannot see, much less comprehend.
Father, please do not abandon me now. Where is your Holy Spirit, that I may worship you? Where is your table, that I may eat? Where is your water, that I may drink?
Father, I have tried to keep your Words but have utterly failed. I am a glutton, a thief and a liar. There is no honest way within me, even what I call love is something that dishonors you.
Lord, please heal me from my evil ways. Please soothe my troubled mind and heal my torn soul. All of my wounds are self-inflicted and when I try to patch them they bleed faster.

Create in my a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.

Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me.

Then I will teach transgressors your ways and sinners will turn back to you.
--excerpts from Psalm 51 (NIV)


Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani?